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Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Livin' In Our Hearts

in this hour on this day, four years ago, watching dear family member take last breaths. happy thanksgiving. it is the way of living, of loving. sorrow is a part of life. grief: reminding us of the joy of being a part of someone's life for a time and making it more precious because it ends. I have a hard time not really disliking thanksgiving: "how was your Thnxgivng?" "oh, you know... relived the death of beloved lady, ate turkey or whatever it was, felt like a horrible person watching people smile, petulant four year old doesn't deserve my loving family, and you?" So this year, I step away from the computer (if it means accepting consequences for goals unmet, so be it), take a walk in the trees because I have them in this dear, beautiful place, and offer a toast instead--

Here's to you: Gassho, Selah, Hiraeth, and Amen. Thank you for letting me be a part of your life; celebrating life through death--remembering the impermanence, the love, the joy.

1 comments:

Nita said...

I"m with you girl, know just what you are feeling. I still have lots of trouble with Thanksgiving. I'm also grateful for being there for the last few breaths. I wasn't there for Tootie's but, was there for Pop's. And mostly I still feel grateful....just want the holiday to move on.