Livin' In Our Hearts

in this hour on this day, four years ago, watching dear family member take last breaths. happy thanksgiving. it is the way of living, of loving. sorrow is a part of life. grief: reminding us of the joy of being a part of someone's life for a time and making it more precious because it ends. I have a hard time not really disliking thanksgiving: "how was your Thnxgivng?" "oh, you know... relived the death of beloved lady, ate turkey or whatever it was, felt like a horrible person watching people smile, petulant four year old doesn't deserve my loving family, and you?" So this year, I step away from the computer (if it means accepting consequences for goals unmet, so be it), take a walk in the trees because I have them in this dear, beautiful place, and offer a toast instead--

Here's to you: Gassho, Selah, Hiraeth, and Amen. Thank you for letting me be a part of your life; celebrating life through death--remembering the impermanence, the love, the joy.

Day 2/3: Dublin

Whew, rough day. However, I am happy to say that I have successfully navigated myself around probably the biggest city I've wandered in. but it was for a good cause: the book of Kells and the Old Library, Trinity College. holy. freaking. cow. I can't really convey how awe-inspiring that was; this is as close as I can get: I must now wallow in medieval geekery or go join the first 11th century monastery to devote my life to binding/decorating incredibly intricate gospel collections--it's a toss-up, really....

That was the highlight of the day really. I did not get lost, a first, and that has given me all kinds of hope for success, though I am still having to duck out of crowds in high traffic times. It seems that people operate on a much later schedule than I am accustomed to. I have begun every morning thinking, "you know, this really isn't so bad--why was I worried about this?" Then around 1 or 2, when people come out in droves, I eat my words again. but it is also cheering to know that I have that early morning time to get used to the traffic before it really becomes an issue. I've been dedicating a number of hours each day to solving problems as they come up, though they seem to keep building at a rather alarming rate. That and the constant movement (did I leave anything, where to go, how to get there, etc) has left me little time to concentrate on other things, but I can only see this getting better with time. Anyhow, really too overwhelming at the moment to make anything particularly philosophical out of it, but I'm sure I can work on something. Hopefully moving on to GB tomorrow.

"I must meet this man"

I do believe this college applicant is my hero. at very least, I would dearly love to meet anyone who would (and could) write this:

Essay:
In order for the admissions staff of our college to get to know you, the applicant, better, we ask that you answer the following question:
Are there any significant experiences you have had, or accomplishments you have realized, that have helped to define you as a person?

I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row.

I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.
Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the Mets. I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after school, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.

I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I bat .400. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me.
I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me.

I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four-course meals using only a Mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prizewinning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.

But I have not yet gone to college.

"barreleye fish," Macropinna microstoma

ok, this is just cool...